Got woken up at 10:30AM after four hours of sleep, and looked at my phone to check the time only to see that the first BTS comeback trailer for Map of the Soul: 7 officially dropped. And holy fuck, it's intense.
We knew Suga was going to be doing the next comeback trailer solo track based on the cycle of previous comeback trailers (RM was the first one with "Intro: What Am I To You?" in 2014 with Suga's "Intro: Never Mind" second, and so forth; so with RM doing the last comeback trailer with "Intro: Persona" from last year's album, it was Suga's turn to do the next one). And, wow, it's way darker than I expected it to be. Right off the bat, this song is a totally different sound than what BTS has explored before. It starts off as a really dark-sounding hip hop, like Eminem circa Relapse, and then there's a drop and a really heavy bass sound comes in that almost gives it a nu-metal feel. (The sound reminds me a bit of Korn's "Issues" album that came out in 1999, so basically, I'm nostalgic as fuck.) Truly, when BTS said they wanted to explore all genres of music, they weren't kidding. There's no one more suitable to foray into this sound than Suga, and I genuinely think he killed it here.
Lyrically, it's an incredibly introspective song, which is not surprising coming from Suga (whose solo mixtape work under Agust D is very blunt, very heavy, very critical, and very dark). The song is like a continuation of the poem he revealed during the season finale of Run BTS! 2018, in which he contemplated, "We dreamed about flying high up in the sky, but it's too high and cold... The brighter the light on us, the darker the shadow." In "Interlude: Shadow," he's acknowledging that he had big dreams and he's finally reaching them. But there's always a trade-off to success and fame, and now he's confronting his fears of the downside because he knows he can't escape it. He's choosing to continue chasing his dreams while accepting the inevitable struggles that it entails.
Honestly, I'm listened to this song about three times through so far, and I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say this is absolutely my new favourite solo track.
I wanna be the top
I wanna be a rockstar
I want it all mine
I wanna be rich
I wanna be the king
I wanna go win
I wanna be…
I wanna be a rap star
I wanna be the top
I wanna be a rockstar
I want it all mine
I wanna be rich
I wanna be the king
I wanna be me
I want a big thing
Oh boy, let me see
I got a big dream, yeah
I wondered everyday how far I'd go
I came to my senses and I find myself here
Yeah, hmm, shadow at my feet
Look down, it's gotten even bigger
I run but the shadow follows
As dark as the light's intense
I'm afraid, flying high is terrifying
No one told me
How lonely it is up here
I can leap in the air but also plunge
Now I know running away could be an option, too (pause)
People say there's splendour in that bright light
But my growing shadow swallows me and becomes a monster
Up high, high, and higher, higher
I only go higher and vertigo overtakes me
I rise, rise
I hate it
I pray, pray, hoping to be okay
The moment I'm flying high as I wished
My shadow grows in that blasting stark light
Please don't let me shine
Don't let me down
Don't let me fly
Now I'm afraid
The moment I face myself brought the lowest
It so happens that I'm flying the highest
Please don't let me shine
Don't let me down
Don't let me fly
Now I'm scared
Don't let me shine
I wanna be a rap star
I wanna be the top
I wanna be a rockstar
I want it all mine
I wanna be rich
I wanna be the king
I wanna go win
I wanna be…
I wanna be a rap star
I wanna be the top
I wanna be a rockstar
I want it all mine
I wanna be rich
I wanna be the king
I wanna be me
I wanna be…
Yeah, I'm you, you are me, now do you know
We are one body, sometimes we will clash
You can never break me off, this you must know
Yeah, yeah, can't break me off, whatever you do
Yeah, you'll be at ease if you admit it, too
Yeah, succeed or fail, whichever way you flow
Yeah, you can't escape, wherever you go
I am you, you are me, now you do know
You are me, I am you, now do you know
We are one body and we are gonna clash
We are you, we are me, this do you know
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